Reliving an old post! My 1st post ever 5 yrs back! :-) A real life incident :-D
It was a few weeks ago when I was still busy with exams & all of a sudden I got a call from my buddy Levin & he was like “dude come over to my place for lunch tomorrow”. I was excited “Whats the occasion” I asked. “Nothin special, Im cooking” was his answer. For a second I didnt know what to say. “U there??” he asked. I said “yeah yeah, U cooking????”. “Yes & be sure that u make it & I’ve called some other friends over too”. Relieved that there’ll be others to share the grief “Yeah sure” I said trying to sound excited & at the same time making a mental note to have a heavy breakfast the next morning.
I had to go to college so when I reached his place it was just a little late, but with plenty of time for lunch though. When i made it there finally I saw that the others were already there.
CHARACTERS- Binoy, Pearl, Karen, Relin & ofcourse Levin
THE SETTING – Levin’s Dining Room
Of these people Binoy was an old friend from school, Karen was a friend from college & I was meeting Pearl & Relin for the 1st time.When I entered all these guys were sitting around the table & Levin was pain stakingly explaining a board game to them which they were about to play. I opted out of it(which i was really thankful for later!!). Looking at everyone’s faces I knew immediately that nobody could understand what the game was but everyone pretended with some even asking the occasional question. Nobody wants to look dumb you know.I made a prediction that Levin would win the game coz I was sure that no one else understood what the game was all about. Anyways they began playing & it went on for about an hour. Binoy had that determined look throughout. He wanted to win desperately even though he had no clue as to what was going on.Karen kept circulating some card to everyone throughout the game.Relin pretended to be enjoying & Pearl…Well she was’nt even pretending.She kept fiddling about with everything & yawning. Finally the game to an end and VOILA!! the winner was……..NOBODY….Huh?? Yeah you heard it right. Nobody won. The fact that even Levin couldnt manage to win even though he was playing against 4 people who had no clue as to what they were doing says something, doesnt it?? Then everyone blamed poor Relin saying that there was no winner coz she cheated during the game. Give me a break!!! How can u cheat in a game that you dont even know how to play in the first place?? . Well…she agreed that she cheated( which makes it all even more weird).
CHARACTERS- Well pretty much the same
THE SETTING – The Kitchen
Levin went into the kitchen to have a look at the “food”.We all began packing the game up. Suddenly Binoy realised what the game was actually about & began screaming “Now I understood the game”…huh?? I know its getting all too weird. So then we went into the kitchen
WAIT A MINUTE…..THIS IS GETTING ALL TOO BORING. LET ME DRAMATIZE IT A BIT
We were done with the game. Levin went into the kitchen. We all looked at each other. We knew that the time had come. Our worst fears were about to come true.The moment of truth. We were scared, we were confused,we were helpless. We were surely too young to….well not die but have a stomach ache or something( Do people die of stomach ache???).We looked at the main door. I knew that everyone had just one question in mind,”could i make a run for it?”. But we all knew that it was just not possible. Levin would get to us even before we would get halfway through the hall. Hungry, scared, dejected we made our way to the kitchen in a single file like Prisoners of War. There Levin was standing saying”everything looks good”. Everyone was standing far away waiting for the other to make the 1st move. Seeing that nobody else was coming forward I grabbed my plate & went first. I smiled to comfort the others( coz I remembered the movie Bhagath Singh).I went to the rice first. I grabbed the spoon to take the rice. I tapped the spoon with rice onto my plate.Nothing happened.’Tap’ again nothing happened.Then I scraped the spoon with another. ‘Splat ‘the rice fell on the plate. Now that was done I looked at the rest.Other items on the menu were palak paneer, curds & vegetables.I put everything in my plate , mustered up all the courage & put the first morsel in my mouth…….
Now after such a build up to the story im sure you must be expecting me to say that it was either very bad or very good. But here’s where a bit of anti-climax comes in. It was neither good nor bad.It was STRANGE. Strange because everything tasted absolutely the same, not similar.SAME!!. I mean u eat rice & then palak & then the vegetable & have a sip of water. SAME. Infact if we would run out of palak , it didnt matter coz you could make do with the rice.Everyting tasted the same afterall!!! Infact for the 1st time ever I realised that water had some taste. Everyone else started having their lunch silently. Levin still kept sayin “everything looks good”. Somebody(either Relin or Pearl) said there was a jar of pickle in the cabinet. Everyone ran to get some.I’ve never seen so much demand for pickle ever. Now atleast we have something that tasted diffferent. Well anyways somehow we managed to finish whatever was in our plates. I dont know what had gotten into Levin. He still kept saying” everything was good, nothing got wasted”….DUH!!!!
Well whatever it is , it was an experience(I didnt say good or bad). I also know that Levin wont stop trying. He’ll definitely call us all over to his place once again & TRY n cook again. Ill definitely go. Till then Im gonna enjoy & appreciate every meal that I have everyday.
It was back in the year 2000 when I had my 1st tryst with internet. Back then “cyber centres” as we used to call them were a rage. There seemed to be one on every corner of the street & a money spinning machine. Students used to waste their pocket money mostly over nothing!I remember that there were 2 categories actually…an hour of games used to cost 40 bucks & an hour of internet used to cost 55 bucks. Whether you chose internet or games, the aim was to make use of every minute of the hour so that it was total paisa vasool coz otherwise it would seem like a huge waste of money (which in any case it actually was)!
Cut to 2012…. How things have changed. Those very cyber centres seem to have disappeared into oblivion! Coz now who needs bulky computers when the world is at ones finger tips. Yes ! mobile phones, those tiny things which were once considered to be used to only to call or msg people is used for everything except to call people & maybe as toilet paper!
Nobody needs an introduction as to what one can do with internet. By bringing the net within the grip of the palm, it has opened up innumerable, previously unimaginable avenues! Today I use the phone for everything other than calling people!
Gone are the days when you used to here that catchy number on MTV & wait for an eternity in front of the tv to hear that song again! These days all you have to do is type the song out on your phone browser & choose from the 100s of options available on how you want to hear it! Why type??? Infact just keep your phone near the speaker when a tune is playing, turn on ‘shazaam’ & let the li’l brain inside the phone search the song, give you all the details which you wouldn’t get even in any magazine & also watch the video!!! Also tag it, share it friends, find the lyrics, practise the song with the karaoke feature, learn how to play it on the guitar using the chords feature on the net. Whew! The only thing remaining is to meet the music director & thank him which you may also be able to do if you win the online contest :-D
Lost & found?
The other I was travelling with my wife & friends to a resort at around midnight & as expected we got lost. Our wives kept telling us to stop the car & ask someone for directions. Bah! You can imagine what it did to our huge egos. So what does my friend do? He whips out his galaxy note, goes to google maps & voila! Gets the exact route! The ladies aren’t impressed & they persist on us asking for directions, but our relief the phone took us to our destination safely! What an ego boost that was :-D
Being a PG, one doesn’t exactly get time to sit & read the newspaper at leisure. Infact most of the time one just gets to brush through the headlines from the sports & local news. Well not anymore. you can read all the news around the world & at ones own time without even the hassle of carrying a newspaper around! Whats more you can even comment & discuss it with total strangers! What fun is politics or sport if you cant put down someone else’s team.And mind you it comes with the entire package of weather information too.
Your waiting at the doctors clinic(I like that example), your waiting for your date to show up or your plain frustrated with the world. These days you don’t need to sit idly watching other peoples faces stupidly or they yours, wondering what the hell can I do to distract myself. You can kill aliens or beat Schumacher all on your phone. Use the net & you can even play live with total strangers whom you would never meet in life. Also it would save your relationship coz you wont complain about your date being late always!
Gone are the days when you only SMSed your friends. SMSing was once considered cool, well not anymore… today you have Watsapp, Facebook on the go, on the phone. You don’t need to wait to reach home to see the likes on your pics or your friendship requests. You can do it on your phone any day & anytime. Just beware of those serial status updaters through phones,they’ll update every minute detail of their life which will probably make you puke, you can block them anyways ;-D
Remember Munnabhai MBBS? How he wasted so much of talk time on calls while copying during exams? Now you don’t need to! Got a smartphone with internet? Just type in what you want & use it to write beautiful, textbook answers in your answer sheet. After all nobody here said that only good things about the internet should be written ;-)
The Confused Phase
I wanted to blog, I thought I had loads of ideas & that thousands of people would flock their computers just to catch a glimpse of what I wrote so I started a blog after a lot of research. And that research mainly focused on whether I choose WordPress or the one that sounds like Clogger. Once I decided to use WordPress(for no particular reason back then) I was all excited. I created the profile with my very own name in the top bar! Ah! My name! My ego was on cloud 9. Went to “New Post” & realized that I was not good enough to blog! So I did the easiest thing that I could think of. I went to Youtube & uploaded the “Nikes 1st cricket commercial” video. Then the wait began. I began checking everyday. On the 3rd day or so the page visits went from 0 to 1. Wooooohooo I had my 1st visitor! Thank God to that one soul who finally came & saw it. I tried to find a way to track him down & mail him an official thank you letter but that ofcourse was’nt possible.
The Blog Phase
Every blogger worth his salt will tell you that the “visitors” & the “comments” on his blog excite him! Now that I knew that there was atleast this one guy out there I began a barrage of posts… Within 3 days I posted few videos, an article on torrents & what not. The next 2 months seemed to be so so so dead! Nobody came! I mean nobody! Not even that 1st guy! I knew I should’ve chosen Flogger over WordPress…or was it Clogger… I don’t know but Im sure more than 1 visitor would’ve come on Slogger.
The Damage Control Phase
Now I was certain that if this blog had to serve any purpose I gotta stop waiting & do something. I started posting a steady stream of articles, some good & some pathetic. And I did something extra. I joined facebook. So I began posting the articles on my wall (Ofcourse WordPress didn’t have the auto share with facebook like they do now) The poor guys on the my friends were fooled into visiting my blog & slowly the visitors increased, not by much. Maybe 10 or so which was definitely more than the 1 which I was happy with on the 1st day. Monthly visitors increased to about 45 or so & once hit 70. Life was good!
The sudden interest that I had slowly began to fade away. People were visiting but not a single comments, not a single “like”. Man cannot live on bread alone, he needs his ego fed too. Im not someone with an iron will, I give up very easily so I did the best thing! I disappeared from the blogging scene. Infact I didnt even open my blog site for about 6 months.
The “Im Back” Phase
One day after 6 months or so I just logged into my account & I noticed that the last 6 months showed a steady stream of visitors, not much about 20 to 30 per month even though I hadn’t even logged in! Yeah that really amused me! So people do come here! I posted with gusto for the next 4 months & was happy with the response
The topics began fading, the mind stopped working. I kept getting flashes of brilliant ideas but when I sat to write them out I couldn’t go past the 1st two or three sentences. I realized that it was time to leave. It was time to give up once again and that’s something Im really good at!
The Daily Post Era
I came back somewhere around the february of this year. I logged into WordPress with a lotta difficulty coz I had forgotten my password, they sent me a temporary one which no one would remember even if they tried & was pleasantly surprised with the better, sleeker & a livelier interface. But for me the best part was the “The Daily Post” initiative along with the “Featured Post” & “Freshly Pressed” features. WordPress had finally become a “reading” site along with the “writing” site. I became a part of the daily post challenge & the results are here to see for everyone! I have readers visiting my site, commenting & also discussing the posts! A thousand readers a month is definitely a big improvement from 50…don’t you think so? :-D So 3 years with this site has definitely been a great ride so far & hopefully this time Im here to stay :-D
The “Wrong Number Moment”. Im not talking about the wrong number of the phone variety. This is the one about the mistaken identity. Here’s what happened to a friend of mine. He walks into a cyber café, sees a long row of guys sitting on the computers with their backs turned towards him. He notices one guy there who’s back of the head has a remarkable resemblance to a close friend of his & so goes & slaps him his hard on his head saying “Yo dude, what you doing here.” Unfortunately for him when the head turns its that of a complete stranger who himself looks totally confused & obviously in pain. The entire cyber café is looking at my friend who just feels like digging a hole & disappearing but cant find a shovel. He mumbles a few apologies & runs out leaving behind him a roar of laughter.
The “My Friends Suck Moment.” Everyone has friends who like to pull a fast one on their buddies. Our friends group is no different. Our group of 5 guys went for a movie. There’s this one guy among us, lets call him X, he’s a bit notorious & crazy. Once we were all seated in the theatre, he gets up & sits on another friend of mine & goes “keeku keeku”. Now that’s bloody embarrassing for the rest of us with the crowd looking at us. During the interval we decided to trick him. We went in early & moved one row behind from our place. Some others came & occupied our earlier seats. The lights went off. Mr X was late & made his way in the dark to the place we were sitting earlier. And as expected he sits on the guy there and goes “keeku keeku” We at the back are falling off our seats laughing. When he realized his mistake he made his way back to us sheepishly & vowed never to speak to us again.
Moment No. 3
The “Stud Moment”. This was narrated to me by a friend of mine. Guys always want to be the studs in when there are girls around. There was this guy, lets call him Mr X (not to be confused with the previous Mr X, You can call him Mr Y if you please) who walked everyday outside a girls college with sunglasses, jacket & what not. He would walk by with a swagger making sure that everyone around him noticed him & at the same time he checked out every girl. But then came that fateful day when Mr X (or Mr Y for some) was walking by with that same swagger, he slips & falls into a small puddle right in front of those very girls. Now girls being girls began giggling & stifling laughs & that poor guy was never to be seen again there.
Moment No. 4
The “Sleep Walking Moment.” This one happened to a friend of mine when I was there & undoubtedly caused my biggest laughing episode. As kids we had these various camps in the remotest of areas where hygiene & cleanliness was not in the forefront. It was to make us “TOUGH”. Army training tough. We were posted to have duties in shifts at night which was a part of our training programme. One night after my shift I woke up my friend to start his shift. The sleepy guy walked to the restroom(it was barely one with animal & human poop) all around. So he walks sleepily & suddenly realizes that there’s something right in front of him that he shud’nt be stepping on. So he jumps, slips & unfortunately lands on it!!! To this day we laugh remembering that moment!
Moment No. 5
The “That Was’nt Me Moment” This is one of the common, silly, gross for many and still one of the funniest moments for all. Its when you or someone in your group decides or without deciding releases some air just to gain some relief! It’s a an “EEEEEWWWWW….. moment” Some of you just reading this might call it “EEEwww gross”. But then it does happen. And if the person admits that “Yes that was me”… he get the “EEEwwww shameless” reaction & if he says it wasn’t him then he’ll get the “Guilty conscience, that’s why he’s denying….EEwwww” reaction.